19.9.16

Life Lately | Postnatal Depression


It's been well over a year since I wrote a post about suffering with Postnatal Depression and I thought I would share how I've been getting on since then, as I don't think I've really mentioned it on my blog since.

I was diagnosed with PND in September 2013, when Sophie was just three months old and 
I've been on-and-off anti-depressants for three years now. In all honesty, it has been a bit of a roller coaster ride, with plenty of ups and downs along the way. Sometimes it has felt like a constant battle with myself and it hasn't been easy. But I'm feeling positive now and I think I'm finally coming through the other side.

Throughout my treatment, I've had frequent visits to my doctor (around every 8 weeks), just to make sure everything is okay and I'm on the right track. At one point, when I was at my lowest, I was taking three tablets a day but in October last year, we slowly reduced them to just one a day - which is what I'm still taking now. I made the mistake (several times) of stopping the tablets completely once I felt fine. But I realise now that is not the way to do it.

I'm pleased to admit that I feel the best I've ever felt now. I feel like me again and I've started making an effort with myself. I put make-up on and do my hair most mornings and I no longer cry at the slightest thing. Don't get me wrong - I still have the occasional down day and lack motivation sometimes too. But I just feel like I'm in a good place and I think I'm finally ready to come off the tablets

At my next doctor's appointment which will be sometime next month, hopefully if all is well, I think we will reduce the dose further, to just every other day, as we have it discussed previously. Admittedly, I'm quite nervous about the day I come off the tablets completely and the weeks and months following that. It's a huge step and I'm scared about relapsing again, but I'm glad I'm doing it properly this time.

After three long years, I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

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20 comments

  1. I'm glad you can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's always a good feeling when you feel like the time is right to come off them, I'm proud of you for taking your time, after going cold turkey myself previously - I know how hard it can be. sending lots of love. You got this mama. x

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    1. Thank you lovely! Such a huge step - but a positive one! Fingers crossed :) xx

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  2. So good to hear you are feeling things are looking up. My sister has suffered with PND to quite an extreme level so I know that it is such a hard thing to go through. Good luck sweet x

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    1. Oh no, sorry to hear that :( PND is such a horrible illness. Thank you xx

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  3. Glad to hear things are looking up for u. I've had depression but not PND and some days can be so tough.

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  4. Oh lovely, I am thrilled that you are feeling better and thinking of reducing your anti-depressants. I really hope that coming off your anti-depressants is successful and it definitely sounds like you are doing it the right way. Good luck. And remember that you don't always have to feel okay and that you are allowed to ask for help when you need it. Hugs Lucy xxxx

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    1. Thank you so much Lucy. Fingers crossed things are on the up now xx

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  5. Ah thats great that you are feeling happier, don't be scared, you sound like you have the support and have done well.

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    1. Thank you, it's been a long time coming but I'm feeling positive! x

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  6. I've never suffered from PND, but know that is can be soul destroying. Lovely to hear that you're feeling more positive.

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    1. Thank you! It really is such a horrible illness x

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  7. Emma I am glad to hear that you are recovering slowly. It's great to read positive things about people who suffered from PND. I never had it but I do have other problems I need to sort out but I am not quite open about them if you know what I mean.

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    1. Thank you so much Janine. Oh that's understandable, I hope you get the help and support you need x

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  8. I'm so glad you can see the light at the end of the tunnel and well done for talking so openly and honestly about your struggles. I'm sure you'll help others who are suffering. Do you do any therapy as well as the tablets? I had CBT for eating disorder problems and it changed my life!x

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    1. Thank you so much for your lovely comment Sarah! Nope I haven't had any therapy, although if my PND returns in the future I will definitely consider it x

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  9. I am so glad to hear that you can see light at the end of the tunnel. It can be such a lonely and scary time.

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  10. Oh lovely. I am so so glad to hear that you are feeling a little better and can finally see that light at the end of the tunnel. So brave of you to share your journey so openly too. Always here if you'd like a chat sweetie, feel free to pop me a message whenever xxxx

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    1. Thank you so much lovely, I will do :)xxx

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